Manning Up at the Super Bowl

The quarterback takes the snap under the glow of streetlights. The young play-caller rolls out of imaginary arm tackles and stiff arms make-believe pass rushers. Looking deep into the end zone, marked by tin cans and t-shirts, he hurls the squishy Nerf football for the game tying strike. “It’s all tied up! The Super Bowl is all tied up!”

Kids in backyards and back allies have played out the fantasy finish to the Big Game for generations. But Sunday in Miami, Peyton Manning was living the childhood dream, as the Indianapolis Colts trailed the New Orleans Saints 24-17 in Super Bowl XLIV in front of the biggest TV audience in history.

It seemed almost inevitable; Peyton was going to tie it up en route to the signature Super Bowl comeback. The fantasy was coming to life with each first down, and it seemed like the only question was whether Manning would ride the Tea Cups or Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride first in Disney World.

But instead of a touchdown pass, the previously flawless Manning threw a pick right into Tracy Porter’s arms. Kids at home begged for a redo. The dream had turned into a nightmare as they watched Porter prance 73-yards for the score.

Down 31-17, even backyard quarterbacks know hope is dim. And the desperation drive proved futile for the Colts when Manning’s pass to Reggie Wayne fell to the ground. Peyton put his head down and walked into the locker room like a poor sport.

Quarterback Drew Brees genuflected three times to run out the clock. Several players baptized coach Sean Payton in an orange Gatorade bath. And the Saints climbed the steps to receive the coveted Lombardi trophy, completing their ascension into football immortality.

But the story for Manning— as well as for the national media— was the interception.
Colt tragedy rather than triumph marked front-pages and homepages. And images of the interception said it all for The New York Times and Espn.com.

For Manning, the loss will resonate long after the newsprint has faded. Not only the game and the season were on the line for Manning but also his legacy. “TV experts” and the average football-buff at a bar judge QB’s not by passer-ratings and stats, but by Super Bowl rings.

For them, the standards are higher and the criticism is harsher. At the Super Bowl, a play-caller must step under center and under scrutiny. Every first down, as well as every errant throw is magnified, relived on highlight reels and documented in record books.

With a “W” on Sunday, the Colt would have taken one step closer to the ranks of Joe Montana and Terry Bradshaw, each with Four Superbowl Rings. Instead, by dropping the ball, he dropped one notch closer to Jim Kelly, the QB who lost the big game three times.

But for the boy on the playground, the game is the same with only one minor revision. This time in the backyard Super Bowl the boy announces, “Drew Brees throws it deep!”

Pro Bored

If you didn’t catch Sunday’s Pro Bowl in Miami here’s what you missed:

One of the leagues best quarterbacks, Aaron Rodgers, hit Steve Smith and DeSean Jackson for touchdown strikes. Division rivals James Harrison and Ray Lewis put aside their differences and converged on tackles. And the NFL’s best linemen, whoever they may be, did their thing, whatever that is.

I’m sorry to say, those of you who did tune in for the game actually missed more.

For starters—well, there were none. Thirteen of the original starters were replaced due to injuries or the Superbowl. The AFC had a harder time finding a quarterback than I have finding readers of Quick Slants. Payton Manning sat out since he is slated to win the Superbowl on Sunday and Tom Brady begged off to lick his wounds. That left Matt Schaub to call plays for his fellow over paid, under enthused B-listers.

In total, 32 players sat out (17 for injuries, 14 for the Superbowl.) Sticklers for statistics might notice that my numbers don’t add up, 17 + 14 = 31. That’s because there was also the case of the missing tackle. NFC coaches thought they part of a new reality TV version of CSI Miami when Bryant McKinnie was a no-show at two team practices. Clues to the case of the missing meat-head turned up on offensive tackle’s Twitter account, which alluded to partying instead of practicing and lead the team to dismiss McKinnie.

The result was no better from the stars that did suit up.

Foreign offensive and defensive schemes forced players out of position. Steeler’s linebacker LaMaar Woodley earned his ticket to Miami with 13.5 sacks and 62 tackles in the regular season. But the 3-4 AFC defense forced Woodley into coverage, something he rarely does in Pittsburgh, and the NFL exploited him repeatedly on a second quarter scoring drive.

Unfamiliar terminology and play calling confused offensive players as well. Quarterbacks were mic’d up for the game, so fans got to hear the offensive calls followed by receivers asking the QB to put the complicated number system into words they could understand. “Quick out!” the play-caller’s directed.

General lack of effort, pathetic tackling and receivers racing for the sideline to avoid contact made for a long night of television viewing. Fans reaching for the remote turned the channel to something a little more exciting like American Idol reruns or the Hallmark Channel.

The Pro Bowl should match up the best players in the league and should be sweeter than a bowl of Lucky Charms with only the marshmallows. You know, none of those bland X’s and O’s But this game was harder to get through than a bowl of yesterday’s oatmeal.

The NFL should know that we football fans like our games the way we like our breakfast. We don’t care about sweets and gimmicks; we need something satisfying that we can sink our teeth into, something with some meat and grits. And maybe some Flutie flakes on the side.